Friday, October 28, 2005



Well, I finished up penciling all 22 pages of Bite Club: Vampire Crimes Unit #2 (of 6) the other day and now comes the task of inking it. This is my favorite part because it requires less problem solving and gives instant gratification of seeing the final black and white art as I ink.

Last Sunday I attended the Seattle Comic and Card Show, hosted by the ever-nice guy, Steve Miner. It was a small show, but that translates into less stress, more fun. I met all sorts of nice folks (hi Jim and Heidi!) and moved some copies of my Fables books, The Batman Training Manual, Private Beach, and sold some original Lucifer pages. And had great ravioli and pizza for dinner.

Tuesday, October 25, 2005


"Honey, I am soooo out of my league."

Today, I still hate commercials where it's a given that oafy, do-nothing, balding husbands have hot wives. Especially the heartburn commercials.

Friday, October 21, 2005


The Problem With Severed Heads

Why can't Hollywood special effects people make convincing severed heads? I'm not talking using effects to make an actor's head look as though it has been severed, I'm talking the severed head props. I've been watching the HBO tv series Rome and am surprised that in 2005, prop heads still don't look convincing. Now, having never handled a human severed head, I can't be 100% sure about this, but from what I've seen in documentary footage and war photos, I know why they tend to look so fake: Effects gurus spend all their time trying to make the skin look real that they ignore certain physical laws. It's the neck. In movies, when a severed head is placed on a table or flops to the ground, whatever, the neck remains stiff. A real human head placed on a plate is NOT going to be supported by the neck, as movies portray. The neck, if there even is one left, depending on the method of decapitation, would just be a limp flap of meat. It would NOT retain the ability to support the head. Even if there is a stiff portion of the spinal cord attached to the base of the skull, the head still would not sit up straight. It would topple over like an upside-down bowling pin. What the effects guys need to do is dispense with the neck altogether and just have the jaw rest directly on the table, pike, what have you. They do it when they show just skulls on a table or piled up, so why not to the same with a freshly severed head?

And before anyone posts about "You must have a lot of time on your hands to think about this nonsense" think about this: If the guys in Hollywood were doing their jobs right, I would not HAVE to think about this nonsense.

Your sketch (I thought of posting a pic of a real severed head here, but I'll save it for a special occasion)

Thursday, October 20, 2005


Mystery of the Universe # 412

Why can a man spend $70 on a haircut, carefully trim his beard and mustache so it's nice and neat, dedicate substantial time to making sure his sideburns are even, yet somehow never notice that his eyebrows look like those of a 19th century gold prospector, or that he has has a cluster of one inch hairs growing out of his ears? No wonder there are so many single women when this is what they get to choose from. C'mon, XY-er's, get it together!

Monday, October 17, 2005


Just the sketch...for now

Sunday, October 16, 2005


Movie Going Morons Make News...again

For the umpteenth time in recent years, I saw a little item on the news about how much it costs to go to the movies and they ALWAYS do some street interview with some moron who has a complaint that goes something like

"The movie admission is $12.50, $25.00 if you have a date, so by the time you pay for parking, popcorn, and a coke, you've paid close to $50 to see a 90 movie that probably sucks."

Who are these shitheads who can't seem to figure out how to NOT pay $50 to see a frickin' movie? What is the problem here? First off, where, other than MAYBE New York City, does it cost $12.50 to see a first run movie? Hey assholes, ever hear of *matinee price*? People ALWAYS exaggerate this number. Secondly, no one ever said you HAD to buy popcorn and snacks at the concession stand. I know this is how the theater makes its money to pay employees and overhead, so if that's what you want to support, fine, just don't complain about the prices. If not, for god's sake, eat before you go or sneak food in like normal people do. That's why it's called a *concession stand*, because you CONCEED to patronize it, but you DON'T HAVE TO. Thirdly, read some reviews about the movie you are thinking of seeing before you go. If the movie is getting thumbs down by most critics, than caveat emptor, dude. In the end, in order to lodge what is a legitimate complaint about the cost of the movie-going experience, these people exaggerate so greatly that it makes them look like obtuse oafs who can't seem to manage their spending.

Your sketch:

Saturday, October 15, 2005


Day Off

Day off, no drawing or writing today. Wife's orders.

Thursday, October 13, 2005



Ha, ha! If you came here for a sketch you are S.O.L.! All you get is this dorky little picture of my wife and me with friends Dan, Yuka, and Jeff in a cheesy little photo booth in Japan. I remember it was like 110 degrees F in there!

I'll post a sketch soon.


Uncanny X-Mentos...the freshmaker

Well, my editor at Marvel was pleased with my work on X-Men Unlimited and asked me to pitch him some more story ideas. Right on for me. Writing is the direction I want to go, and save the drawing jobs for special projects.

Speaking of drawing, our studio just knocked out eight fully penciled, inked, and lettered pages in a weekend. The art is done in a 1940's style for a special online project. We are still patting ourselves on the back for that one.


Monday, October 10, 2005


News Flash! Idiot Makes My Day!

I'm in the coffee shop the other day and the daily trivia question is: "What is the name of the author who wrote a satire on the bombing of Dresden?"
The answer is, of course, Kurt Vonnegut (Slaughterhouse 5).

As I'm drinking my coffee, I overhear this priceless conversation:

Customer: "Oh, I don't know the answer to that one."

Cashier: "It's Kurt Vonnegut. I had a lady get it right earlier only because she said that she caught part of the Slaughterhouse 5 movie on TV the other night."

Customer: "Oh, well that's probably why I didn't know the answer. I hardly watch TV, maybe once a week at most. I like to read."

Fucking priceless. I love idiots.

Friday, October 07, 2005


The Man With No Sleep

Deadlines again. I guess I'll have them the rest of my life. Oh, go out and buy X-Men Unlimited #11 with my story, thanks.

Hey look, man with his finger bitten off.

Ha, ha!

Thursday, October 06, 2005


United Snakes of America

Whatever....Okay, I got the Luna Moth pin-up done, now back to Bite Club and another quick turn-around project our studio is doing.

X-Men Unlimited issue # 11 that has the X-Men story I wrote is in stores now. Beautiful art by David Aja.

Hey, Susan, I turned on the anonymous post setting! Now your lazy butt can reply to my paltry little postings without having to fill out a profile or other soul-killing online forms. Happy?


Wednesday, October 05, 2005



Holy shit! I am drowning, DROWNING in work right now! Worse than last week (or better, I guess). Apologies. I'll still try and do the daily sketch, but not much ranting for awhile.

Here's a lip-licious babe for you boys and girls. Part of my Bite Club trappings

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